one year review (or how you know you have a child)

This month, the little one turns one. And while I watch her doing her first steps I wonder how fast this first year went by and how much we (and our household) changed during this year. If you don’t have a child and you want to know what you are getting into, here a few wise insights into things that change (to be continued):

– you will finally master the art of multitasking (or what else would you call it when you are able to cook, prepare finger food, make faces, fight with the child-proof lock and pay attention not to step on the baby between your feet at the same time?)

– your flat will be dirtier than before although you clean more often

– you will start leaving the toilet door open even if you are not the only adult in the flat

– you’ll get applause while using the restroom

– you’ll get very nervous if you don’t hear anything

– you will get used to less sleep you will sleep less

– you will notice that your neighbour starts working in the garden at 5:30 am

– you will get aware of the little things in life – ants are so fascinating, aren’t they?

– you will have more discussions with your partner. but you also laugh more often!

– you’ll get incredible biceps

– no-one will blame you if you put your head on the table to close your eyes for a minute

– “no” became the most used word in your daily routine

– you  will constantly tidy up will get used to a certain level of chaos

– you are suddenly aware of loud noises – shame on loud motorbikes, jack hammers in the supermarket, other noisy children and on everyone disturbing the little one’s nap!!

– at the same time, you’ll create a certain resistance towards noise – banging plates on the table, dropping water bottles on the floor, hitting the wall with the baby walker, constant “Mamamamamamamaaaaaa”….just ignore it and hum “always look at the bright side” in your head

– you will get an idea why sleep deprivation is listed among methods of torture

– you will think that your child is the cutest one in the whole world

– you will take thousands of pictures (see point above)

– you’ll make silly noises in public

– you will spent a considerable amount of time on the floor

– the heating pad will turn into one of the most used things in the household. Together with the coffee machine.

– you will be much more sentimental than before

– Relaxed grocery shopping? Probably gone for the next 15 years….

– Having a relaxed evening? Possible! And much more appreciated!

– you might develop a very sarcastic attitude towards childless citizens that complain about getting up early, having a sleepless night, being slightly sick or having an unrelaxed train ride

– you will be able to talk to someone while you have a baby fist stuffed into your mouth

– you will probably eat drooling wet biscuits although you swore never to do that because it’s disgusting. But hey, sometimes there is just no other place to put it

– you can finally take advantage of the “families with small children first” rule at airports

– you bitch about everyone ignoring that rule. Or everyone ignoring to help with the stroller. Or anyone smoking next to the baby. Basically, you can bitch about things and even have the right to do so!

– your life will be completely different. And although you might sometimes think of the old times, when you could just leave the house, go to the cinema or watch the soccer world cup games at midnight, you would not want to miss a single day with your child. Because children are awesome and there are not many things that make you happier than one of these incredible wet kisses of your own child!



About erdhummel

Familial entropy - that's an insight into our current life which has been fundamentally changed last summer when our daughter was born. Having studied in Cottbus, Germany, and worked/studied in Edinburgh, Scotland, we momentarily live in a small town in Switzerland where Karsten is trying to save the environment and Freddie is trying to save our sanity. Since there is not much time for elaborate, long emails while doing that, we thought a blog might be a good option to smuggle ourselves into the lifes of our friends.
This entry was posted in Children, Family, the little one. Bookmark the permalink.

3 Responses to one year review (or how you know you have a child)

  1. plu9570 says:

    Love this!! I swore I’d never eat a sopping wet biscuit but it’s part and parcel…. whilst making the “yum yum”, smiley face too! x

  2. Pingback: two years (or how you know you live together with a toddler) | familial entropy

  3. Pingback: three years (or how you know you live with a three-year-old) | familial entropy

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